Category: tell someone

Fitting the missing piece

You are so intimately aware of me, Lord. You read my heart like an open book and you know all the words I’m about to speak before I even start a sentence! You know every step I will take before my journey even begins.
Psalms 139:3‭-‬4 TPT

I want to say, even strong Christians face life challenges. In my journey with Christ, I got relaxed and because life was good I took everything for granted. When I was going through tough times, I went back to God but I missed him and felt alone. I became depressed and felt a deep void that could not be filled. I was given prescription after prescription to numb the pain but the more I was taking medication the more I felt like I was losing the reality of who I was.

When Holy Spirit was walking me back to my first love Jesus Christ. Everything became clear. I loved God but I did not give him my all. What do I mean? I mean when you have not come to a point where you say I am nothing without him you have not given him your all.

When life is great, you can’t let his will be everything and let your will be broken so that his will becomes a driving force in your life. I had to come to a place where I say everything I have is yours and if you take it it’s fine.

Now I am content and at peace, knowing and understanding that I surrendered to someone who knows my end from my beginning. I have lost things and people who I thought were my life but have gained peace, love, humility and faith that moves mountains. ‘I know my redeemer lives’

For my sanity and my health, I have completley surrendered my life to God. I wish I knew this before, that when you give him control life becomes so beautiful, easy and joyful. I wake up daily to make God the center of my life. I ask ‘Holy Spirit how would you love our day to be like?’ and he leads me, teach me and guide me to the most fulfilling time.

Lots of love

S.C

Learning to trust…

Trust in the LORD with all your heart; don’t rely on your own intelligence.
Proverbs 3:5 CEB

I leaned on my intelligence, family and friends and I realised I needed more… When you go through depression nothing makes sense since the pain is too deep. You can try numbing it, with various things but it stays there. Some of us we have learned to hide our pain so that we cannot be judged or become vulnerable and it won’t be easy for someone to see or help. I understand when someone commit suicide and people get surprized that they did not see it coming.

I went back to my creator who has a manual for my life. I spent hours reading about my relationship with the Holy Spirit and He started showing me how much God loves ME. I began to see my worth, it was like I was reborn again. Scriptures that I knew, began to have a different meaning and I understood them better.

Holy Spirit is very gentle when teaching you to live a fruitful life again. He will not judge you as the world would.I learned to appreciate my self and love again. Loving God first then family and friends with all their faults.

Daily I allow myself to be led by the Holy Spirit and the first person to notice that I was having peace and laughing again was my partner. I am now learning not to worry about anything, my faith is in another level. I love the place I am in, I would say to someone who has lost hope and is in the deep dark place “Its not your fault, even the greatest people in the world they go through this phase, seek help it is not the sign of weakness” I sought help from the most reliable person, God and as always He never disappoint.

I am free from poisonous thoughts and every day is a blessing. I will share with you the mystery of finding myself Loved beyond comprehension.

Lots of Love

S.C